There are many things to feel justifiably angry about, even upset about. The war in Ukraine. Food bank. Seemingly ineradicable misogyny. occasional racism. Triumph. The climate crisis. party gate. Refugees.
Fairly hectic too, because all of those things really do affect all of us, directly or indirectly. Matters of life and death, sometimes. They are part of the country we love and the world we want to live in. We should care, we should comment on social media, we should use foul language in parliament, we should stick to the streets.
But Johnny Depp Y Amber Heard ? I’ve never met them, you won’t be surprised to find out. I don’t know anyone who has. Their lives don’t interfere with mine (an especially strange thought). What they do with their lives, public and private, affects me very little. Maybe if they’re in a movie or something, and I watch it, but that’s it. I am so sorry for what happened to you, as I would be with any couple.
It seems traumatic and terrible, but I think we all know that it is inevitably going to be more traumatic and terrible with the cruel eye of the television camera closing in on them and being the center of global scrutiny on social media. You are not helping these two people.
It seems very strange that many of us are apparently so upset about their troubled relationship, to put it mildly. It’s like a child or a close friend is involved; instead of a couple of strangers who happen to be strangers. In fact many have taken completely partisan positions on them.
Fans feel his pain, not because they have to, as part of the storylines, but because they want to, and they are conditioned to feel emotionally hurt by reading about the case, and what others are saying about it, on Twitter or watching the news.
For them, the Deppites and the Heardians, it feels as if a member of their own tribe or family, or perhaps even themselves, is in danger at court, having the most intimate details of their private lives spread out for the world to see. see them. Their sanity is being punctured, and their reputations for the rest of their lives are on the line. I doubt that Heard or Depp would welcome or value the “support” of their fans, unlike their lawyers.
Of course, it’s nothing very new or unusual at all. We’ve become so used to the bitter wars of attrition over Prince Harry and Meghan Markle that we’ve forgotten what (if anything) is at stake. You are for Harry and Meghan or for Will and Kate. It’s like a game show: Actuals without Sense.
Any word or act of either is automatically used as ammunition in an endless war that resolves nothing, especially since any resolution is off limits to the public. It doesn’t much matter where the Duke and Duchess of York live, what her children are called, or what Meghan’s siblings think of her.
This connection and investment in personalities infects politics from time to time, but it is more understandable because Boris Johnson really matter .
It makes no difference to anyone but me, but I’ve avoided reading too much about the various Heard-Depp court cases because it seems intrusive and irrelevant. It’s their business, and it feels wrong to dwell on the more distressing aspects of her mutual behavior.
People in relationships and families do all kinds of things to each other for all kinds of reasons that are good and bad, and the sterile and remote atmosphere of a court hearing is not the ideal place to capture their moods. conflicting “in the moment”, or even to establish the facts. That’s even more true of the grotesque versions that end up on the web.
If you are Team Depp or Team Amber Heard, fighting a virtual war on their behalf, I very respectfully suggest that you take a few minutes to consider whether the lives of strangers are worth worrying about. Then ask yourself if there aren’t more important things around to do something about.
And then go vote next Thursday. It always makes me feel better.
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‘Team Depp’ or ‘Team Heard’? What your answer says about you
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